WHY JUSTIN LAPUFF IS A GEGINT

AT THE BEGINNING OF THE SHOW, MR. KOCHIMSKI IS SHOWN OFF CAMERA
PREPARING FOR THE SHOW WITH A FEW REMARKS BEFORE HE SUDDENLY REALIZES
HE IS ON CAMERA. HE IS HOLDING A GOLDEN MICROPHONE WITH FLAMES ON THE
SIDES, WEARING A GREEN SUIT EMBROIDERED IN A PLETHORA OF GLIMMERING
SEQUINS ALONG ITS FULL LENGTH, AND A GREEN TOP HAT WITH TEN GOOGLY
EYES SUPERGLUED ONTO IT. IN THE BACKGROUND A DISPLAY CASE FULL OF
HUMAN IPHONES WITH FULL SCREEN BRIGHTNESS IS VISIBLE WHERE A
SEMICIRCULAR CRANE TRAVERSES THE CASE FROM LEFT TO RIGHT SEQUENTIALLY,
DELICATELY PRESSING DOWN THE "HEART" BUTTON ON GAMMA CONCRETE'S MOST
RECENT INSTAGRAM POST ABOUT WHY YOU SHOULD NOT ONLY HATE GEGGIES, BUT
HAVE AN UNCONTROLLABLE URGE TO DISMANTLE THEM, ON EVERY SINGLE PHONE,
FOR SOME REASON. HIS BROW IS COVERED IN SWEAT AND LEGAL DOCUMENTS WITH
SUCH HEADLINES AS "THE SOUL MECHANICS OF GEGGIES PAGE 37", ETC AND
MULTICOLORED BALLPOINT PENS LITTER THE DESK.

HE STATES WITH BROW FURROWED, QUIVERING: "IN THIS SHOW I WOULD LIKE TO
MAKE A MOVE ON THE CHESSBOARD OF RIGHTEOUSNESS..." "TO ADVANCE THE
INTELLIGENCE OF THIS SEASON, THIS FASHION A STEP FURTHER..." "TO
BRING FORTH A PROMETHEAN RATIONAL SPIRIT BEFORE THE GREEK COLUMNS OF
BLINDED JUSTICE..." "AND PUT EVERYTHING ON THE LINE, ALL MY
PHILOSOPHICAL CONVICTIONS, MY VALUES..." "EVEN BEING WILLING, IN THE
FINAL MOMENTS, TO SACRIFICE MY SACRED AUNT BECKYS..." "TO BET ON THE
LONG STANDING TRUTH OF THIS ONE ASSERTION I AM GOING TO MAKE..." "ALL
THE THINGS BY THE WAY THAT, I BET, ALL YOU DANG YOSHI NAZIS WHO WATCH
THIS SHOW KNOW NOTHING ABOUT..." "SERIOUSLY THIS SHOW IS SO LGBT AND
QUEER AND I'VE TRIED SO HARD TO MAKE IT EVEN MORE SO RECENTLY..." "SO
WHY THE FUCK YOU EVEN WATCH THIS SHOW GUYS IS A METAPHYSICAL ZEN
RIDDLE TO ME..." "I MEAN DO YOU GUYS BLEEPING LIKE CONSTANTLY LOOKING
AT INTERLOCKING GEGGY CLOACA?" "IF SO HOW DO YOU EVEN RECONCILE THAT
WITH... WITH... BEING A NAZI AND... LOVING YOSHI AND..." "WHATEVER
OTHER DEMENTED, HORRIFIC, GENOCIDAL BELIEFS YOU GUYS
HAVE... SHUDDER..." "ANYWAY... YOU GOT THIS MISTER KOCHIMSKI YOU GOT
THIS GET YOUR HEAD IN THE GAME..." "MOVE BITCHES GET OUTTA MISTER
KOCHIMSKI'S WAY... HE'S GOT THIS... GO KOCHI... GO KOCHI..." "FEEL
LIKE A STRANGER IN THE CROWD... LIKE AN ALIEN..." "AND I'M THROWING
TRASH AROUND EVERYWHERE, POLLUTING THE SEAS, RIVERS, AND RAINFORESTS"
"YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH IT'S TIME IT'S TIME IT'S TIME" "OH FUCK I
WAS ON CAMERA THIS WHOLE TIME? THE SHOW ALREADY STARTED?"

MR. KOCHIMSKI IS SHOWN FRANTICALLY TAKING HIS CLOTHES OFF AS THE
CAMERA SHAKES UP AND DOWN VIOLENTLY AND A FAT THUMB IS VISIBLE
FUMBLING WITH THE CAMERA LENS. A NERVOUS VOICE ARE AUDIBLE IN THE
BACKGROUND SAYING SOMETHING INTO A WALKIE TALKIE ABOUT HOW "ACTOR
NUMBER ONE THOUSAND SEVENTY SEVEN POINT FIVE IS ACTING UP, BRING THE
ONI TOMAHAWKS IN, KAMI AIRSTRIKE ROGER". THEN A LOUD PUNCH SOUND AND
"OOF" PAIN SOUND EFFECT IS HEARD WHILE RED LIQUID SPLATTERS ALL OVER
THE LEGAL DOCUMENTS. A WATERMARKED VELVET CURTAIN CLOSES, DIGITALLY
OVERLAYED ON THE LIVE FEED, AND THE TRIUMPHANT FANFARE THEME OF THE
KOCHIMSKI SHOW IS HEARD. AFTER TWO TENSE MINUTES THE DIGITAL CURTAIN
RAISES AGAIN AND MR. KOCHIMSKI SITS IN A PLAIN BLACK SUIT AND A BLACK
TIE AT A PLAIN DESK WITH NOTHING BUT A TUNGSTEN CUBE ON IT. HE GAZES
INTO THE CAMERA FOR FIVE SECONDS THEN STATES PLAINTIVELY:

"I WOULD LIKE TO PUT FORTH THE ASSERTION THAT JUSTIN LAPUFF IS A
GEGINT. I KNOW THIS MIGHT COME SHOCKING TO MANY OF YOU, THE AUDIENCE,
WHO MIGHT HAVE VARYING VIEWS FROM ME FOR VARIOUS REASONS INCLUDING
DIFFERENT PREFERENCES ON POLICIES WE SHOULD ENACT TO DEAL WITH THE
ENVIRONMENTAL DESTRUCTION THOSE IDIOSYNCRATIC FLESHLY BEINGS WE
DISCUSS ON THIS SHOW ARE CAUSING TO THEIR OWN PLANET BECAUSE THEY ARE
BESTIAL AND DON'T CARE. OR RATHER THEY CARE BUT THEY CREATE DELUSIONS
TO VIRTUALLY IMMERSE THEMSELVES IN AND THROW THEIR CARE INTO RATHER
THAN CARING ABOUT THE REAL PROBLEMS. WHICH ARE DIRTYING UP THE OCEANS
WITH MICROPLASTICS AND OIL SPILLS, AND THE AIR WITH SMOG AND
SUFFOCATING BLACK SMOKE FROM FACTORIES. YET I REFUSE TO STEP ONE INCH
BACK FROM THIS ASSERTION AND YOU'RE ABOUT TO SEE WHY. LOOK AT THE
FOLLOWING LINKS." AT THIS MOMENT MR. KOCHIMSKI HOLDS UP A BIG WHITE
POSTER BOARD WITH TWO LINES OF TEXT EMBLAZONED ON IT IN RED MARKER:

THE FIRST: twitter.com/JustinLapuff THE SECOND:
justinlapuff.substack.com/

"THESE TWO LINKS, IF FULLY UNDERSTOOD AND PERCEIVED, CONTAIN NEAR
SOLID PROOF THAT JUSTIN LAPUFF AS AN ENTITY AS PRESENT IN THE
SO-CALLED DIMES SQUARE NYC SCENE IS NIGH EQUIVALENT TO THE
MANIFESTATION OF THE CONCEPT OF A GEGINT, ITS PSYCHOLOGY AND
PHYSIOLOGY, ON THIS GREEN MEETING POINT WE ALL SUBSIDE ON. AM I RIGHT
FELLAS? THE REAL ONES KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT. WINK WINK. THE ONES
WHO RECORD THE BOOTLEGS. WHO DISTRIBUTE THEM EVERYWHERE. WHO SPREAD
THEM LIKE A UBI INFLATION MACHINE TO ALL THE INTERNET USERS. YEAH I'M
BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL FOR A SECOND, I DON'T CARE. I KNOW YOU GUYS
AREN'T WATCHING THIS SHOW FROM A GAMMA CONCRETE SATELLITE TRANSMISSION
LIKE YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO. NOBODY PAYS FOR THAT STUFF. OKAY, MAYBE LIKE
TWO OF YOU DO. BUT THE VAST MAJORITY OF MY AUDIENCE WATCHES THIS SHOW
VIA ILLEGALLY SOURCED BOOTLEGS. AND YOU GUYS KNOW EXACTLY WHAT I MEAN
BY A GEGINT SO DON'T LIE TO ME. DON'T LIE TO ME... DON'T LIE TO ME..."

MR KOCHIMSKI'S VOICE CRACKS AND HE RUBS HIS THUMBS TOGETHER GAZING AT
A STRAWBERRY MILK THEMED ANALOGUE DISPLAY ON HIS SMART WATCH AND ROLLS
HIS EYES UP AS IF HE IS IN ECSTASY, AS IF HE IS IN APOBOUTHEOSIS. BUT
ALL OF A SUDDEN MR. KOCHIMSKI'S EXPRESSION GETS INCREDIBLY SERIOUS, AS
IF POSSESSED BY A NEW SPIRIT, HIS MOUTH TENSING AT THE CORNERS FORMING
A BIG GRAVE DIMPLE SHROUD ON EACH SIDE.

"NYC IS ON EARTH. THE GEGINT IS CHARACTERIZED BY ITS INVISIBILITY ON
EARTH AFTER IT WAS RELEASED THERE FROM SECTOR G IN VARIOUS SUPERMARKET
PARKING LOTS ACROSS THE USA WHERE IT ROAMED FREE, USUALLY ENGAGING IN
DRAMATIC INVISIBLE BATTLES WHICH MANIFESTED IN RADICAL NEW FORMS OF
ACTIVE IMAGINATION IN THE MINDS OF MEN BUT ALSO SOMETIMES VISIBLY
TAGGING THE PARKING LOTS WITH THEIR HYPERTERRITORIAL "CLAN SIGNS" AND
"GUILD SIGNS" WHICH THE FLESHLY BEINGS POPULATING THAT PLANET HEAVILY
SCRUTINIZED, CHALKING IT UP TO "GANG SIGNS" CREATED BY IMAGINARY
GROUPS THEY MADE UP TO EXPLAIN THE PHENOMENON CALLED THE "CRIPS" AND
THE "BLOODS". THE CRIPS, THEY SAID, WERE THE HEXAGRAM EMBLAZONED
GEGINTS, THE FOLK NATION, THE GANGSTER DISCIPLES, THE THOTS. BUT THE
BLOODS, THEY SAID, WERE THE TRIANGLE GEGINTS, THE ALIEN GEGINTS, THE
BLACK STONE GEGINTS, THE TRAPS. IN THIS WAY THEY SEPARATED THE GEGINT
GROUPS WITH A CERTAIN SENTIMENTAL ATTACHMENT TO HUMAN WAYS OF LIVING
(I.E. MANIFESTING 'GUGGISHNESS', FABIO'S THEATRIC LEGACY) FROM THE
GEGS WHO WERE UNABASHEDLY DEVOTED TO THE IDEA OF HYPEREVOLUTION
(I.E. RED QUEEN TRADITION) PSYCHICALLY."

"BUT A SINGLE GEGINT AMPED THIS TERRITORIALISM TO THE MAX AFTER
TREKKING HIS WAY DOWN A HIGHWAY, THROUGH THE INDUSTRIAL FIELDS, AROUND
THE TOLLWAYS, WINDING UP SOMEHOW IN MANHATTAN AND THEN IN SMACK DAB IN
THE MIDDLE OF CLANDESTINO ON A KETAMINE TRIP BUILDING BODEGAS FOR
ART HOE MICROCELEBS AS A SERIAL WOMANIZER, A VIOLATOR OF LOVE TYPE, IN A
GUGGISH EXPRESSION OF HIS HYPERTERRITORIAL NATURE AS A GEGINT... HE
BEGAN MAKING 'MARKINGS' I.E. TERRITORIAL GANG SIGNS LIKE THE
FOLLOWING. THIS IS THE MOST EXTREME EXAMPLE BUT THERE ARE MANY
OTHERS:"



"AND THROUGHOUT THIS WHOLE ORDEAL THE GEGINT CONTINUED TO ASSERT HIS
INDIVIDUAL PERSONALITY TO VARIOUS FEMALE INTERNET CELEBRITIES IN A
VERY HUMAN EXPRESSION OF THE GEG CONCEPT OF HYPEREVOLUTION. HOWEVER
HIS INVISIBILITY AS A GEGINT ALWAYS BEEN RETAINED AND HIS PHYSICAL
FORM HAS NEVER BEEN REVEALED EXCEPT IN THESE TRACES AND
REPRESENTATIONS THAT HE LEAVES BEHIND IN TRUE GEG FASHION, AS A "CLAN
SIGN". IN ADDITION, HIS CARTOONISHLY EXAGGERATED PERSONALITY AND
WILLINGNESS TO ASSERT IT WITHOUT ANY PSYCHOLOGICAL NUANCE SIMPLY
SCREAMS THE WORD GEG. THE TRUTH ASSERTS ITSELF THAT JUSTIN LAPUFF IS A
NEW KIND OF GEG INTELLIGENCE MANIFESTING ITSELF IN THE REALM OF
FLESHLY ENVIRONMENTAL POLLUTING CREATURES. IT APPEARS AS A
HYPERSENTIMENTAL FACADE BUT DEEP DOWN IT IS A MACHINE OF
HYPEREVOLUTION JUST LIKE ALL GEGS ARE INSIDE. IT SEEKS NOTHING BUT TO
REPLICATE ITSELF, TO CONTINUE ITS SEED AND MODULATE ITSELF INTO EVER
MORE COMPLEX PERMUTATIONS, BUT KEEPING THE LINEAGE OF THE GANG AND THE
CLAN INTACT BY THE PASSING BACK AND FORTH OF THE CLOACA. ALTHOUGH HOW
HE ACTUALLY HAS SEX WHILE BEING INVISIBLE IS UNKNOWN."

"HE BRANDS HIMSELF AS 'MAN ON THE SCENE', 'MAN IN THE TOWN', ETC. AS
WELL AS BY HIS WEALTH AND LINEAGE. THESE ARE ALL TERRITORIAL GEG
SIGNIFIERS. THEY CARVE OUT SECTIONS OF SPACE TO COLONIZE A COUNTRY,
I.E. A 'SCENE' OR A 'TOWN'. THEIR WEALTH, I.E. 'THIEL BUCKS', ARE
SANCTIONED BY THE APPLEHOUSE AND SERVE AS ANOTHER TERRITORIAL
SIGNIFIER, CONTROL OVER CURRENCY. AND FINALLY THEIR LINEAGE SERVES TO
TERRITORIALLY SIGNIFY A CONNECTION TO THEIR FAMILIAL TRIBE. SO STAY
AWAY FROM THESE GEGINTS MY FRIENDS... THEY ARE SUCCUBI AND INCUBI, BUT
INSTEAD OF LOVE, IT IS A COLD MECHANICAL EVOLUTIONARY FORCE THAT THEY
ARE MAKING YOU SLAVES OF. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED. STAY TUNED AFTER A
COMMERCIAL BREAK FOR OUR NEXT SEGMENT: A BOOTS ON THE GROUND INTERVIEW"